A parody of At the Zoo by Simon & Garfunkel
Parody written by David Cohen and Performed by Don Caron
Executive Producer Jerry Pender
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LYRICS TO WITH THIS CREW
by David Cohen
Someone told me it’s not happening with this crew.
I do believe it. I do believe it’s true.
(Whoa Oh WHOA Uh Oh)
They’re a waste of our tax dollars
From the East Coast to the West.
Just a PAC of hate filled losers who loathe blue.
Yet they can stall and make a fuss
as they try to stop change cold.
Their constituents all love it when they do.
And they do now.
Doesn’t look like it is happening with this zoo.
I do believe that. I do believe it’s true.
(Whoa Oh Uh Oh)
Just a herd of “Power Brokers”
from the Senate to the House.
And their grunts are meant to rile and confuse.
They howl there’s no climate change
and they rearrange our votes.
while meddling with a woman’s right to choose.
Right to choose now.
Something tells me it’s not happening with this crew.
I do believe it, I do believe it’s true.
(Whoa Oh Uh Oh)
McCarthy shows no honesty.
And Ted Cruz is most unkindly and he’s dumb.
MTG’s susceptible to changes in her rages
And did Mo Brooks wear a Kevlar vest for fun?
Jordan is reactionary,
Gaetz is sure no missionary.
Caucus plots in secrecy
and gum the works quite frequently.
What a gaffe we do not care to see
with this crew.
It’s a zoo.
Yeah, this crew is a zoo.
With this crew it’s a zoo.
ABOUT THE SOURCE MUSIC
At the Zoo Music and Lyrics by Paul Simon
“At the Zoo” is one of Simon & Garfunkel’s single releases in 1967. The song is one of Paul Simon’s many tributes to his hometown of New York City, and was written for the soundtrack of The Graduate, specifically the scene which takes place at the San Francisco Zoo. However, the song was not used in the film.
The song begins with Simon’s short lyrical introduction in the key of A Major, but it soon transitions to the key of G Major, being a whole step down from the beginning. The narrative tells the story of a trip to the Central Park Zoo; when the singer reaches the zoo, he anthropomorphizes the animals in various amusing ways. The song was licensed in advertisements for the Bronx Zoo, the San Francisco Zoo and the Oregon Zoo in the late 1970s.
In 1991, Paul Simon released a children’s book titled At the Zoo (ISBN 0-385-41771-3) which combines the lyrics of the song with the very detailed illustrations by Valerie Michaut. To make this book considered “age-appropriate” for children, Simon made changes and additions, including identifying Rum as a beaver (because the original lyric states that “the zookeeper is very fond of rum”) and giving the hamsters headlights (because they “turn on frequently”).
“At the Zoo” was first released as a single in 1967, reaching #16 on the Billboard Hot 100. After that, it was released on the following albums:
The Simon and Garfunkel Collection: 17 of Their All-Time Greatest Recordings (1981)
The Best of Simon and Garfunkel (1999)
Tales from New York: The Very Best of Simon & Garfunkel (2000)
The song was also performed live by Simon and Garfunkel in the Old Friends: Live on Stage album in 2004, as part of a medley with “Baby Driver”.
An alternate version with almost completely different lyrics is available on the bootleg The Alternate Bookends. These lyrics have nothing to do with a zoo, but rather speak of a musician’s girlfriend having changed while he was on the road. The song begins, “Something tells me things have changed since I’ve been gone”; “Something tells me” is one of the few phrases that is still present in the released version.