It’s been a few days since Trump announced he would make a good pope but we just couldn’t let that go without a commentary of some kind. So here you go.
Executive Producers Don Caron and Jerry Pender
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IF ONLY I WERE POPE LYRICS
[Verse] I’d paint the sky in golden hueTrump Tower steeple
Breaking through
The Vatican walls would shine so bright
Gilded chandeliers in holy light [Chorus] If only I were Pope
Oh the things I’d do
A red cap turned gold
A flashy debut
Heaven’s gates would have my name in view
If only I were Pope
Dreams would come true [Verse 2] I’d redecorate the Sistine Dome
With portraits of yours truly
Carved in loam
Replace the Swiss Guards with suits so grand
Mar-a-Lago robes
By the Pope’s command [Chorus] If only I were Pope
Oh the things I’d do
A red cap turned gold
A flashy debut
Heaven’s gates would have my name in view
If only I were Pope
Dreams would come true [Bridge] Catechisms in bold
Eleven-point font
Mass tweeted in Latin
’cause that’s the haunt
A golden escalator would bring you near
Confess your sins on my microphone here [Verse 3] Every Sunday I’d televise the scene
Hosting sermons like a liturgy queen
Merchandise for the faithful
Sold worldwide
Holy Trump relics for your bedside
Lona Goudswaard
Brilliant.